What am I going to do with the boys gone? I'm going to need some of your help with this one:)

While facing a really big obstacle for my Mama heart, my mind has flashed back to one of the first. Driving away from college, leaving Justin there by himself, my mind went back to March 1996 when we were so excited to be able to finally bring one of our babies home after being in the NICU for 3months. The problem...we were leaving our other baby there!

The pain was so great that I could hardly breath as tears rolled down my cheeks.  

Yep, that happened again Sunday night as we drove away.  

Initially, I thought, 'stop this, Trisha! Hold it together!' after all, I had Kyra in the front seat with me,  and Jordan, Courtney and Jet in the back. 

Then the Holy Spirit reminded me 

"When you are weak, I can be strong"   2 Corinthians 12:9-11

"God holds every single one of my tears and it's okay to cry"  Psalm 56:8

"I'll never leave you" Hebrews 13:5, Joshua 1:5

It was when I looked in the rearview mirror and saw tears rolling down Jordan's cheeks, that I thanked God for reminding me it was okay to be weak, to cry, to feel that struggle.  

I'm convinced that Jordan needed to let those same things process, and he felt comfortable to struggle because he wasn't alone in his struggling.  

As I glance at Courtney rubbing Jordan's back, I felt kind of silly because here she was, at 19, and hasn't seen her Dad in over 4 years because he died from brain cancer and all I was having to do was not see Justin for a few days and Jordan for a few months.   As I apologize, she has no idea how powerfully the Holy Spirit used her words "Why are you apologizing...it's hard"

As I began this year with a focus of 'closer to Jesus in 2015', I should have but didn't realize those words would come with trials because after all, I'll need to face situations that I could not handle without Him.  It started with part of our roof blowing off...just ours...not anyone else around us...which was a hefty deductible to be replaced.  God provided!  Then, I went into surgery to fix my shoulder from an accident at the previous summer's mission trip...hefty medical bills and hefty pain and rehab....God has healed and is still providing!  Jordan's truck broke...God provided!  Justin rolled his Tahoe...God protected and provided!  Jordan swore into the National Guard in April...God provided the direction and peace!  Justin interviewed for Ag-Power & applied for Navarro...God directed and provided!  Justin has moved into his dorm and began classes... "Mama, my English teacher is nice and the lasagna is really good!"... God is providing!  Jordan leaves September 8th for lots of time away....God WILL provide whatever it is he needs, I need, we need!!

So what am I going to do with both boys gone?  

I do have another child... poor Jet has heard these questions for the last year.  Honestly, it kind of makes you want to punch those people in the throat (another Mom and I have shared the same feelings, but thankfully the Holy Spirit keeps us from that craziness).  

Jamie, Jet & I will have some adjusting... Jet has to decided each night which bed he wants to sleep in, who's clothes he wants to wear, and no one else is going to drink his chocolate milk :)  

For real though, it's going to be weird & hard, but definitely all good!

 AAAAAAANNNNDDDDDDD.... I'm finally going to be obedient and stop making excuses!  I've run away from this long enough, but when a total random customer you just met says 

"You should write a book!",

I KNOW it was God gently reminding me again!  I've traced it back to 11 years ago that the first person said it to me, but I've said things like 'you don't have a degree', 'how will you pay for it to be published', and 'what in the world am I supposed to write about'.  

So, as I watch my children walk by faith, going into the unknown but know God is with them,  I'm going to do the same.  This is all something God has been showing me all year long.  Jamie, Jordan & I were working out, and Jamie turned and looked at me saying "Are you struggling, too?"

I stopped... he kept running...but when I got to him, I said "I think God just used you and gave me the title to the book."  He said "You're welcome with a smile!"

That's exactly what my heart cry has been about...

Letting others see/know that we struggle...being very real about it...
BUT our God is faithful, He is loving and He is so so big!  He is ABLE to do immeasurably MORE than all we ask or imagine according to HIS power working in us....all for His glory!  Sharing our Ephesians 3:20 story and helping others to do the same thing!

Why?  People's ETERNITY is at stake!  They need to SEE God's power at work in us!
1 Corinthians 2:4 says "My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a DEMONSTRATION OF THE SPIRIT'S POWER, so that your faith might not rest on men's wisdom, but ON GOD'S POWER"

I really honestly believe this is a collaborative effort... here is why...

We all have different struggles!  I don't know yours and you don't understand mine!

But when we connect people who DO UNDERSTAND because they've been through the same, WOAH!  It's amazing!

Here's how you can help...

1.  Be a prayer partner... what a great , great privilege we have to speak to our living God!  First and foremost, we will bring to God every thing that is done.  We want the Holy Spirit to be in complete control at all times!

2.  Be willing to share how you've seen God through an obstacle you have faced

3.  Be part of a team that shares the same obstacles

So, after praying about it, if you are led to be a part of  Are You Struggling, Too?,
shoot me an email at obstacleovercomers@gmail.com
letting me know you'd like to be a part.

I don't have a clear picture of what this looks like, but that's okay, while "Looking to the LORD and His strength; seek His face always" (Psalm 105:4) He will, no doubt, provide!!

When each side is pulling, it just doesn't turn out right!

I've never claimed to be a seamstress but I've occasionally tried to mend things.

So when Jordan had a problem with his zipper, I busted out the needle and thread and did a little stitching.  Bless his heart- when he put them in his bag to put on for baseball the next day, I don't think he intended on them looking like this.....

Go ahead and laugh... I promise, I still do when I look at this picture and remember Jordan coming in from baseball with them like this saying "Mama, I think you might have missed something."

I absolutely missed something... it was obvious at the tugging of both sides of the fabric around the zipper, and WOW! How God has taught me a lesson from Jordan's messed up zipper!

I've had a lot of tugging going on in me, around me, and seems like a lot of places I look.  I've been praying....well, to be honest sometimes I pray.  Other times, I get mad.  

SO much conflict, and mostly, it's amongst people who call themselves believers in Jesus....myself included.  

James 4:1-3

1 What is causing the quarrels and fights among you?  Don't they come from evil desires at war within you?   

Every single battle I've watched or had within my own heart comes straight from selfishness...we want what we want.  Oh, it doesn't always seem that obvious.  It comes in all different forms and sometimes even in what is a good thing.  Giving is a good thing, right.  Giving of our time, our talents, or our resources, but with many times with that giving, we want recognition, we want people to know that we gave, we want to feel good because we gave.  

2a You want something but don't get it.  You kill and covet, but you cannot have what you want.  You quarrel and fight. 

Goodness, those seem like harsh words, and are most of us going to ever physically kill someone? NO!  But you and I both know that certain words have been said to you (or maybe words that aren't said)  or things have been done to you that you are still physically alive but that may be all.  Your spirit is crushed!  

But what is it that we are chasing or wanting so badly that we will fight, quarrel and kill... 

more possessions, more money,  closeness in our relationships, higher status or more power, or maybe even peace, joy, self-control.   Again, it's easy to say, "Oh that isn't me", but think about a recent conflict in your own heart.  Oh, not one that anyone can see.  I'm talking about the ones that when you lay your head down on your pillow at night and it's just you and God, what comes to your mind.  

The thing that God has shown me over and over in this in the past few months is this...

If someone does something ugly to you, don't make it about you.

If someone is struggling and maybe acting different, don't make it about you.

If someone does something that you and they both know they shouldn't do, don't make it about you.

If someone says hurtful words, don't make it about you.

Ephesians 6:12 says "For we are not fighting against flesh and blood enemies, but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places."  

Satan wants nothing more than to kill, steal and destroy (John 10:10) so think about this...

Whenever a trial comes your way, what is your reaction?  Is it that of trusting God to work it for your good?  Or do you like me, sometimes take matters into your own hands, pick up the needle and thread and try to fix it only to later still have a bulging zipper.  Sorry, had to throw that in there because how many of us have we reacted and therefore our insides are busting at the seams!  My hand is raised!!!

I'm quick to be like the people who brought the woman caught in adultery to Jesus...quick to pass judgement on her sin, although I have plenty of my own sin to deal with.  

2b-3 Yet you don't have what you want because you don't ask God for it.  And even when you ask, you don't get it because your motives are all wrong you want only what will give you pleasure.  

How does your prayer life look?  

Do you talk to God at all?  When you do, what do you talk about?  

Do you ask God to satisfy your desires?  Do you seek His approval for what you already plan to do?

What is it that we REALLY want?  I'd have to say deep down inside, we all have the desire to be right with God.   "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled."  Matthew 5:6 and PRAISE JESUS the rest of John 10:10 has the answer that even though satan comes to still, kill, and destroy, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."

Once you have decided that you believe Jesus is God's son, He died on the cross for your sins, and rose again, and you trust in HIs free gift of salvation, the Holy Spirit is constantly drawing you to Himself, speaking and guiding you.  Are we listening?  Or do we think we have it all figured out because we go to church?

James 4; 6-10 And He gives grace generously.  As the Scriptures say, "God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble." SO

7a. Humble yourselves before God  (Humbling ourselves means recognizing that our worth comes from God alone.)

7b.  Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.  (I think about if someone was going to try to come take my boys from me, I would fight with all I had.  Guess what parents, satan is trying to do the same... you know what your weapon is... Ephesians 6:17 sword of the Spirit...word of God.  Know Truth and live it out!)

8.   Come near to God, and God will come close to you.  Wash your hands you sinners; purify your hearts for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.  (Where is your focus... earthly (self) or eternity(God))

9.  Let there be tears for what you have done.  Let there be sorrow and deep grief.  Let there be sadness instead of laughter, and gloom instead of joy.  (When you do something that is wrong, do you take responsibility, do you feel bad for what you do or is it easier to try to laugh it off like nothing happened.)

10.  Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor. (to be humble involves working with his power according to his guidance, not with our own independent effort.)

We are surrounded and can sometimes ourselves be stone throwing Christians and to be honest, it's usually over things that have no eternal meaning.   Then, we wonder why people don't want to be a part of our church (which by the way..isn't the brick... it's the body of believers).  

I came across a verse a few weeks ago because 'curriculum happened to be changed today' and it has been SO powerful in my life.  I love God's timing!

2 Corinthians 2:3-4 says this

"I came to you in weakness and fear, and with much trembling.  My message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of the Spirit's power, so that your faith might not rest on men's wisdom, but on God's power."

Let's let our life be a reflection of His power!  

Warning!  This will require things that you, alone, can't handle.  

No worries- write this verse were you can see it ALL the time..

2 Corinthians 12:9  

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

Amen!  I pray we all live in HIS power TODAY!! 

Jordan's Perfect Surprise

Mama, I have a random question.

You never know where those words are going to take your conversation with your son, 

but two weeks ago on a Sunday night, 

it was probably one of my favorite conversations I've ever had with Jordan.  

He asked me what I thought about long engagements.  He and Courtney have been dating for almost four years now, and as he moves on to his "next" and leaving for bootcamp in a few shorts weeks, it didn't really surprise me much.  The one thing that Jordan wanted to do was surprise her with the engagement, and our trip to Red River seemed like the perfect time for him.

As with many questions Jordan has asked over the last few years, my answer has been the same on all of them.  See, as a parent, we aren't the Holy Spirit in our children nor can we know all the right answers or have the peace for an answer for them.  I believe that "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6 means teaching them to listen to the Holy Spirit and be obedient to His leading.  There comes a time when our children have to realize that they have to stand before God for their own actions and whether they were obedient or not.  If we, as parents, try to make all their decision or always tell them what we think they should do, how will they learn the power of the Holy Spirit directing them? 

So to Jordan's question, my answer was this... "Jordan, people will say 'your engagement was too short, your engagement was too long, and many, many other things just like when Daddy and I got engaged at a young age, but the only important thing to do is to be praying and letting God lead you.  I can't know the perfect timing for you.  I will be praying for you and will support whatever decision you make."  Cool thing was when he text Daddy (since he was at the fire station when we had this conversation), he received the same response!

Genesis 2:18 says

" The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone.  I will make a helper suitable for him." 

It has been so awesome watching these verses in real life with my boys, and I'm more than thrilled that Jordan has found his suitable helper.  Courtney is a precious young lady with an amazing story!  She's strong beyond her years as she has sought God through some major obstacles in her life.  

No doubt, she loves the Lord and my Baby B, 

and by the smile on his face, you can tell how much he adores her!  

   

  

It was definitely a special day climbing that mountain 

with such an amazing surprise awaiting at the end.  

Isn't that such a perfect picture of life?  

What we have awaiting us- well, we really can't even imagine how awesome it's going to be especially when sometimes it's super hard to keep climbing and 

you are out completely out of breath... 

"I can only imagine, what it will be like

When I walk, by Your side

I can only imagine, what my eyes will see

When Your face is before Me

I can only imagine

Surrounded by Your glory

What will my heart feel

Will I dance for You Jesus

Or in awe of you be still

Will I stand in your presence

or to my knees will I fall

Will I sing hallelujah

Will I be able to speak at all

I can only imagine

I can only imagine"

just as Courtney had no idea how awesome it was going to be for her at the end of her climb!  

 So excited that we'll be gaining another daughter!  

When will that be?  We aren't sure yet, but how cool to know God has it all under control and His Holy Spirit will guide and direct them!