What if we Flip our Focus

What do you see when you see this picture?  It's not a trick question :)  Seriously, no one really knows your thoughts except you and God even though you could give me any answer you want, but I want you to think about it seriously.

Some immediately see the walker.  Some will see Justin's big smile.  Some will note the teenager that is helping him and the cool hairdo and sunglasses he's sporting.  Or some might see Justin's feet.  There is a variety of things depending on what you are looking at that can catch your focus.  

We've had many different responses from people over the years as Justin was in a walker, forearm crutches, casts, braces, and walking independently with a different looking gait.  A very large portion of responses have been that people feel sorry for Justin.  I've even heard the words "oh thats pitiful" from an elderly lady.   A lot of people have instincts to want to move towards him to help him...especially the numbers of times he used to fall running to catch Jordan on the field as Brandy & Darrin Fulfer reminded me of on our last blog.  Great memories!!  

What I love the most is when I hear that people focus on his determination. his grit. his never give up. his big smile even when it hurts. 

Our focus is everything, y'all!  We can easily, in our human nature, find everything and anything to complain or gripe about, justify staying in a pity party, or criticize.  

But Jesus...   

Jesus died on the cross for you and me to give us ABUNDANT LIFE.  

When we choose Him as our Lord and Savior, he deposits His Holy Spirit into us to live supernaturally. 

Justin doesn't have the strength and determination he does on his own.   

  

I don't have the joy I have because I've worked hard to get it.  

We have received what God so graciously have given us.  

We have believed His promises, tried our best to live them out daily (thankful His mercies are new every morning), and continually- sometimes minute by minute- refocus our thoughts on Him!

Sometimes in life- when you find yourself in the midst of lots of negative thoughts or perhaps, you are going through one of the hardest times in your life.  Remember these words..

FLIP YOUR FOCUS!

What do I mean by that?  Do exactly what Hebrews 12:1-2 says..

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.  Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God"   

Instead of focusing on 'everything that hinders or the wrong you have done'- throw it off.  It's weighing you down...give it Jesus.  Then move... you have purpose friend.  I don't know the race marked out for you, but I know God wants to use you to brighten someone's day, meet someone's need, speak life into someone, etc.  Focus... fix our eyes on Jesus.  He's the author of our lives and he he has JOY set out before us.  

It may not feel joyful right now, but hold on tight to that focusing on Him!  You can be confident that God is with you, He's gone before you, and He's working all things for your good.  "being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."  Phil 1:6.  

Can you imagine what it's going to be like when Jesus returns?  OH MY!!  What a day!  This boy is going to sprint so fast to thank Jesus first & then I can just hear it "Throw me a pass Jordan!"

   

Everything we go through in life either weighs us down or lifts us up.  We get to choose!  #luggageorladders

"Mama, he’s already seen me"

This boy... 

He endures more physical pain on a daily basis than I could ever imagine, but he perseveres through it so well.    As he’s gotten older, he’s obviously been more aware of people’s responses to his cerebral palsy or being deaf and it hurts... sometimes maybe more than the physical pain.  Most of the time he endures through it well and sometimes, it just hurts.   

It is difficult to watch both as his Mama & Daddy.  The difference between us and him at this point is that we have 24 years of experience enduring it (not the physical, obviously, but the mental or emotional pain that can come with responses to your child).  Justin doesn't remember everything just as a lot of kiddos don't, but we have told him story after story.  Praise Jesus, He's helped us to look to HIM and the IMMEASURABLY MORE that HE CAN DO instead of focusing on the pain.  

&&& HE'S DONE IT YET AGAIN & Justin being 24 has experienced it fully!!!

During the end of July, August & September, he worked for a local school district hoping to get to be on and work on equipment since that is what he loves, went to college for, and is actually very particular and good at doing.  Due to probation periods, he spent the hottest days of 2020 walking school campuses picking up trash and blowing off sidewalks and walkways.  Before you get upset reading that much like Mama and Daddy struggled with, consider how Justin himself endured it well making comments like "I'm at the bottom of the list and need to work my way up."  After a few weeks of it, it was obvious his body physically was just not going to withstand it, but while he waited for prayers to be answered, he continued to work because he doesn't use excuses EVER.  Blows my mind & humbles me often!!

About a month ago, Granny "just happen" to find a company on facebook to come give her an estimate on some dirt work around her pond.  She "just happen" to have to leave on an emergency (everything is fine now..praise Jesus) but it resulted in her asking Justin if he didn't mind meeting with  him and taking him to the pond to discuss what all needed to be done.

After riding back up to the house on the gator,  they stood and talked on the drive way for a while.  Justin ended up asking him if he happened to be hiring.  Chad immediately answered yes and gave Justin his card to call him the next day to schedule an interview while he could look at his calendar.  

A few days went by and Justin said to me at dinner one night "Mama, I feel good about this... he's already seen me."  

It took me a second to get what he meant.

My heart... 

it was my first time hearing him say anything out loud & acknowledging that he knows he gets treated differently.   He wasn’t mad at anyone.  He wasn't angry.  He wasn't sad or having a pity party.  He was just looking forward...   He said "I've been to many interviews where I am more than qualified.  They are nice and say they will call me, but they never do.  Chad has already seen me." 

&& once again, God uses Justin to teach me a great lesson.   He was showing me "Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus." Phil 3:14 

I've not met Chad yet, but I've thanked God for him every single day since.  Justin went to the interview- they talked for over an hour about all the things.  His pay is incredible, they have benefits & he gets lunch brought to him every day.  He couldn't wait to get started & this smile just buying all the shirts to get ready...PRICELESS!!!

He's been at work for two weeks,  and was asked "because you are such an asset to our company, I would like you to take classes to get your CDL" last week.    

WHAT?!?!  IMMEASURABLY MORE just keeps coming over and over!!  WAY MORE than any of us could imagine or ask!!!

&&&Because God is just TOO COOL....yesterday, I got to watch Justin work with my own eyes because they are on Granny's pond now.

YES, Justin drove & used this crazy big piece of equipment!!!  He got the truck that brought it in the gate safely (YIKES!), helped him unload this excavator, saw to it that he got out of the gate okay, and climbed up in this John Deere and had the TIME OF HIS LIFE!!!   

"God is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us to him be glory"  Ephesians 3:20

It is hard..so hard sometimes to endure the difficult times.  I believe with all my heart that mindset about the hard is everything.   I'm not always good with it, but praise Jesus, that doesn't stop God from working.  

Everything we go through either weighs us down or lifts us up.  We get to choose.  We can choose to focus on Jesus and know He is working for our good.  WOW! What amazing things He can do!  Tears of joy roll down my cheeks as I'm so very grateful for the hard... it's made these moments and this smile so

incredibly amazing!!

My Bible, My Boot, and Me Trying to Be Still

I'm so very thankful that my heavenly Daddy has been working on my heart well before I ever walked into the orthopedic's office yesterday.  He's so good like that and is so faithful to meet all of our needs. 

I knew something wasn't right due to the pain I was having... have been having since August.   Since I am "one of those" that did all the reading all over the internet to try to see what it could be, I kind of had an idea of what was going to happen.  But when the actual words came out of Dr. Prudich's mouth that I needed to be in a boot, my initial response was wanting to cry.  I knew better with Dr. Prudich in the room as well as my sweet hubby who immediately had me laughing.  Not that it wouldn't have been okay to cry at all, but I was grateful that everything God has been teaching me came flooding back into my mind and heart. 

I do have an injury from being active!  (Side note...please don't say "I told you not to Crossfit!"  I was running when it first started acting up!)  I have learned that exercise is a celebration of what my body CAN DO and not a punishment for something I ate or the number on the scale, and I CAN DO some pretty cool things at 44 years old!  I love to move and I love how I feel both physically and mentally when I move.   I will take an occasional injury from being active ANY day over taking prescription meds because I'm not healthy.  It happens!  Now, the way I respond is crucial!

As with everything in life, I believe God teaches us spiritual lessons through physical circumstances.  Thinking about this pain in my heel for several months now, I've reflected on how being active is why I have an injury to my Achilles tendon.  Had I not been playing sand volleyball, running, box jumping, and all the things, would I still have this injury?  I will never know or don't need to know.  But what I do know is I have not missed out on any of the fun I wanted to have doing all the things my body can do!  I took the risk, I did the things, I got hurt, but I WILL HEAL and get back to all the fun!

Don't we do this in life sometimes?   Whether it is a relationship that we don't give our whole heart to out of fear of being hurt, a leap of faith in business when you don't really know exactly how to do everything out of fear of making a mistake, or maybe even getting up off the couch and becoming active for fear of an injury.   

I've been hurt in relationships, but I've also been extremely loved on by other relationships.
I've make mistakes in business, but I've also met some amazing people I wouldn't have been able to meet had I not tried.
I've had the injuries, but I've also done so many things I never dreamed I would be able to do. (&& will do them again!!)

When the pain, mistakes, or injuries come, it's how we handle them that determines so much of our next!  We can withdraw and quit altogether which is what our flesh screams to do sometimes OR we can believe His promises with all our heart, be still and know that He is God,  and He is working ALL things together for our good!     

I'm on a three weeks in the boot and if not better, surgery!  This surgery is 10-12 weeks of non weight bearing which seems SO LONG!  I'm believing for healing and trusting God with whatever that looks like!  In the mean time, I'll be rowing with one leg on a skateboard (I HAVE to see my friends and do some kind of movement),  watching for satan to try to throw darts at me, but learning into Jesus even more knowing He holds the VICTORY!!!

You've Got To Eat More Food!

"You need to eat more food" is definitely not what I've been used to hearing when trying to figure out how to loose weight all these years.  My hubby has tried to tell me for months maybe even years that I wasn't eating enough.  Then Cole, my Crossfit coach, spent lots of time putting a meal plan together for me, but honestly, it scared me how much food was on there.  There have been several others, but it's been so engrained in my head that you have to eat less to loose weight that I couldn't do it.

On our last dunk (body analytics testing), Marjorie explained some things to me that I haven't understood like I did that Saturday morning because the Holy Spirit did what He does best and gave me a spiritual picture. 

Based off my results, she said if I was in a coma, my body burns 1880 calories to function.  Then she asked me what I did the day before.  I did two WOD's at Crossfit so she said that was probably 800-1000 calories.  Then I worked all day and worked the concession stand that night.  So she added and said my body probably needed 3300-3500 calories that day.  She asked what I ate, and it was around 1500 calories.  With creating such a deficit, she said that my body was holding onto the weight because it was protecting itself from not receiving proper nutrition.

Then it clicked!!

Many times in my life, I've 'worked out' by teaching classes, serving in volunteer roles, working, being a wife and Mom and anything else to anyone else.   But I never fueled myself with proper nutrition (time with the LORD and in His Word). Oh I would grab a bite from here and there, but I was definitely undernourished plenty of times.  No one would know it... I can smile and keep going with the best of them.  But the weight I was carrying...still do sometimes... is too much!

The bitterness and negativity was there.  The hardening of my heart was there.  Wondering how things could be a certain way and how people could just shut you out?

RELEASE....God gave me this word several weeks ago!!  It's BIG ya'll! 

Marjorie gave me minimum calories to eat.  She said DO NOT eat under 1800 calories on days you don't work out and 2200 calories on days you do work out.   She was actually very stern with me about it because she knew the damage that I was doing to my body.  She said "If you would stick with this, your body WILL RELEASE the fat."   I confirmed I understood & would do it until I see her again in October.

The first week, I lost 5.4 pounds.  I couldn't believe it!  I haven't lost 5 pounds in a year even with doing more workouts than I ever have before!  I was so excited!

But then I went back to not eating because the insecurities crept back in and made me question everything & guess what, the 5 pounds came back!

But this SO mimicked me getting on a kick for God... reading, trusting, praying, studying, writing (like I know He's prompted me to for years!) which resulted in RELEASING me to be more loving, forgiving, etc. 

Then, for whatever reason, I go back to my old ways... control, worry, negative thoughts, talking about others, etc.  and gain all that heaviness back in my heart!

So, I'm finally sitting down to be obedient since He gave me this topic months ago.  I am by no means a professional health coach and know that every person is completely different, but here is what I know to do.

Based off my day, physical or spiritual energy spent, I have to replenish appropriately! 

"Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness (being right with God), for they will be filled."  Matthew 5:6

"If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink.  Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him."  John 7:37-38

Well fed is my goal!  Both physically & spiritually!  The thing that is so cool is God helps us... we feel hunger pains... now to pay attention and eat!

Miracles, Healing & Firefighting

Oh the wrestling that goes on inside my thoughts!  Lately, I've thought a lot about Justin & God healing him here on this Earth.  How stinkin' cool would that be?!?!

Don't get me wrong!   God has already done some miraculous things with this boy!  This time 22 years ago, I was staring at his very frail body, hooked up to a ventilator still 6 days after birth with a multitude of lines and monitors attached to his very tiny body.

We were told he would never talk, walk, ride a bike or go to college!  He very much talks, very much walks although it looks different than most of us, and just graduated Navarro college in May with an associates degree.

This is where a struggle arises!  He has done all of those wonderful things, but his heart's desire is to be a firefighter like his Daddy, brothers and what little brother will do when he graduates.  We've talked about scriptures like "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart."  Psalm 37:4.

But without complete healing, Justin will not be able to be a firefighter.  It's a huge struggle for his heart right now.   Many, many conversations are "But Mama, I just want to be a firefighter."  He knows the Truth in Ephesians 2:10 that "he is God's masterpiece, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for him to do" and Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him who have been called according to his purpose."  "But Mama, I just want to be a firefighter."

Last night, I was telling him about all the different things I've been seeing.  I hear two different songs come on the radio almost every time I get in the car. 
Hawk Nelson's "He Still Does Miracles"
Like the fire in the night
Like the ocean parted wide
Like the grave empty inside
You will see
He still does
Miracles

as well as Unspoken's "Miracle"

Don't you give up on a miracle

You've got to speak to the impossible, oh
You've got to pray till you break through breaks through the ceiling keep on believing
Don't you give up on a miracle (don't you give up)
You've got to speak to the impossible, oh (you've got to speak, keep on believing)
Pray till you break through breaks through the ceiling keep on believing
Don't you give up
Don't you give up on a miracle

Pray till you break through breaks through the ceiling keep on believing

And I hear different messages from pastors that say things like "You're living your entire life saying what if God doesn't instead of thinking what if God Does.  What if God does heal me?"  When I look up Scripture, I see things like Psalm 77:14 "You are the God who performs miracles, you display your power among the people."

We talked about whether it was okay to pray for him to be healed on this earth or whether that meant we weren't okay with him having cerebral palsy and being deaf.
We talked about when Jesus was teaching about prayer in Matthew 6 where it says "your will be done on earth as it is in heaven" because we know he absolutely will be healed in heaven!!!
We have faith & completely believe God is ABLE!

Then right before bed,  Justin says "I'm going to keep praying that God will heal me.  I know He may not for reasons I don't know yet and that's okay, but I'm going to keep asking."


Tears as I thought about this picture where Justin was trying to teach Rexton to walk a couple weeks ago.  I remember a conversation with Bro Clint that is very similar to this entire blog, and he ended it with "I only hope Henry (his first and only grandson at the time) walks like Justin."






























God has been using Justin to teach me how to walk for 22 years! (nothing physical involved!)  Maybe his firefighting has nothing to do with physical either...hmmmmm:)

"God is able to do immeasurably more than all I ask or imagine according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever!"  Ephesians 3:20

Excited to see Justin's Ephesians 2:10, 3:20 & Romans 8:28 promises continued to be revealed in his life!!

Daddy signed you up....

Back in August, Jamie called and asked what we had on the calendar for September 9th.  There was nothing down so he told me to mark it off... clearly he had scheduled something.  Little did I know the magnitude of what was going to happen on that Saturday morning and days to come.

Jamie had signed him and Justin up to be partners at the 343 Throwdown Crossfit competition at Crossfit Wylie.  I had the biggest chillbumps when he told me!!   Justin's reaction at first was a big smile...then he was somewhat questioning it since he wasn't able to go practice a whole lot due to work.  Jamie told him all along 'we are just doing it for fun!'  I believe those words from Daddy were all Justin needed, and he was ready to go!

There were three different WODs (workouts) which they would do together...dividing them up as needed.   The director of the competition knew Justin would need specific modifications... no big deal.  He was wonderful!!  As they began the 2nd WOD, there was talk about what he would do since there was a run involved.

Yep, you guessed it!   Justin took off and made that lap...not just once but a few times during that time allowed for the workout!  Oh the smile on his face says it all!!


The 3rd WOD was beginning, and it included some abmat situps which Justin couldn't do without someone holding his feet.  Jamie said, "let me take them all... you just do the rest as much as you can."  I'll never forget as they made their way through the three rounds.  Towards the end of the 3rd round when the rest of the competitors had already finished, they gathered around Jamie and Justin's square and began cheering them on as they finished the workout.  Immediately after finishing, Jamie grabs Justin and hugs like they've never hugged before.. He was a very proud Daddy & Justin was very thankful for his strong Daddy!  The high fives and hugs from literally every competitor in that round was unbelievable along with the tears from all the spectators watching!!



As I went over my notes this past Saturday morning at 4:00am before my very first speaking engagement ever, God totally spoke in a big way about these three pictures!!!
1.  He's 'signed us up' for some challenges!  He knows that we are capable of great things because He will be with us and He is ABLE to do immeasurably more than we imagine or ask!  These are never meant to be done on our own... they are meant for us to know how much we need Him!
Will we be obedient and show up or have excuses why we can't?
Is it a hard conversation?  Is it a job change?  Is it reaching out to someone who has hurt you and offering forgiveness to them?  Is it accepting Him as your Lord & Savior?
What is it for you?

2.  I realized watching this that it's exactly how God is with us.  It really doesn't matter what anyone else is doing or amount they are 'lifting'.... He just wants us to be willing and He will carry most of the weight anyway.

3.  I also realized that when we let the Holy Spirt work in us, we are capable of more than our brain tells us.  Watching Justin take off and run when he wasn't planning on it just showed me that when we let God work, we realize we can do A LOT MORE than we think!

4.  Talk about watching a picture of "a great cloud of witnesses". These other men had already completed their challenges, and they came over to cheer on Jamie and Justin.
Hebrews 12:1 says "Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked our for us.  Let us fix our eyes on Jesus"
Think about those that have gone before you and are currently cheering you on to finish this life with perseverance!!!

5.  Just imagine when our challenges in this life are over, Our Heavenly Daddy putting His arms around us saying "well done!"

What will that day look like for you?

Haven't done so well in the past... remember there is NO condemnation for those in Jesus...
Ask him to forgive you and start fresh today saying YES to HIM!!

Don't know Him and aren't sure of your eternity?  PLEASE ask how you can be sure!!

Dreams, Dates & Dead Mice

I have this passion in me that has been burning for quite some time.

I want so deeply for people to know that God is very real, He's very much a part of our every day lives, and He wants to do immeasurably more than all you can imagine or ask!

Here's just a glimpse of my last 24 hours and how I know He is real and His Holy Spirit is so so powerful!

Let me give you just a bit of back ground...Back in February, my dream of speaking became very real as I received an email from the FBWomen's Ministry leader, Trish Lappin, asking me to speak at their conference on September 16th.  This email came on a day when there was some very real hurt going on in my heart.  As I read it, I was in awe because I have been dreaming about this and praying for God's perfect timing for several years. That morning, I told one of the boys, as he was going through a storm, to stay focused.  God has big plans, and we just have to keep our eyes on Him.



I believe our attitude and mindset changes EVERYTHING!!

Fast forward a few weeks when I was asked to give a title to the conference so they could start working on marketing materials and promotion.  After a few days, I realized a theme that just kept crossing my path and my mind, so I emailed it to Trish.  "Moving Mountains" is the theme and Matthew 7:7 is the foundation of the whole day.  "ASK and it will be GIVEN to you, SEEK and you WILL FIND, KNOCK and the door WILL BE OPENED to you."

Then I see this pop across my facebook.... y'all... dreams REALLY do come true!!  There is a real date on a calendar that says "Trisha Graham" as the speaker!!!  None of this is about me... it's all about Him and His power which is what I want to explain today.

Just Sunday morning (two days ago) in our Young Married Growth Group, I made the statement about Jesus being the best teacher ever.   With several teachers in our class, we all agreed than when you teach the kiddos something, you test them to see if they 'got it.'

So now between that statement and titling the conference "Moving Mountains", God is giving me and Jamie an opportunity to pass a test.  Yesterday, we had C&D out because the boys air conditioner wasn't working.  Upon checking out the system, Keith found that mice had had a feast in our unit resulting in us having to replace the entire outside unit which is around $5,000.  Really, mice?!?!  What in the world?  Then, as Jamie left for work this morning, he notices a hose laying on the ground under his truck as well as wires hanging.   We are pretty sure the dogs were after something up in his truck.   As he begins to drive it, messages come across like 'four wheel drive disabled' and "anti-lock brake system disabled."  

We don't know yet what the dollar amount on this one is, but here is what I do know.... God knows! This alone is HUGE!!  A few years ago, I would have sat here crying about how we were going to pay for everything and why did it have to happen to me.   But, as the Holy Spirit prompts, I remember to "count it all joy when I face trials because the testing of your faith develops perseverance.  Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. "  James 1:2-4

After Jamie called, I sat down to read and journal....

Y'all this was the top of my page in my journal as I turned to an empty page to write...
  
Notice the verse!!!!!  Matthew 7:7 (see above... yes!  It's the women's conference foundation!)

No doubt, we are facing these mountains because it's only going to be through Him that they move which will result in us being able to have yet another picture of How God is so so real, He's very much a part of our daily lives, and He wants to do immeasurably more than we can imagine or ask according to His power at work in us to Him be ALL GLORY!!!

Amen!!!

I can't wait to write again and explain how God moved these mountains!!